Today was a pretty calm day for Jay. She slept 12 straight hours through the night last night. I'm sure she's so exhausted bless her heart. She's slept the majority of today. She still has a lot of fluid on her little body. She's beginning to cry quieter and quieter and I have a feeling that has to do with her vocal chords. I really hate that she's having such a tough week but I trust God to send some good days her way.
In the 9th chapter of Luke Jesus tells His disciples to "Follow me". What I'm learning is that a "willing" follower of Jesus realizes that being a follower is not going to always be convenient with our lives. Challenges will come, difficulties will be presented, trials will happen. It's easy to get comfortable with our lives. It's easy to get into a routine. Sometimes we try to fit Jesus into our routine. A serious follower builds their routine around Jesus. But when we're "willing" followers, our priorities are in order. When our priorities are in the "correct" order, Jesus comes first. It begins and ends with Him. When we put Jesus first in our lives we drop everything for Jesus. Everything. We no longer focus on our flesh but we began to focus on His Spirit. Even when we don't understand, even when we don't agree and even when we just don't feel like it. It's not about us. Help me Lord not to deny you but to become the "willing" disciple that you desire for me to be. It's all a choice. I don't fully understand things. I don't understand at all. I don't understand why this sweet precious child of mine has to bear this cross that's been given to her. But Lord I'm willing and as hard as it is, I surrender all. Please Lord continue to shine your bright light in the midst of our dark days. Carry us on the days that we cannot walk. Give us vision on days that we cannot see. Give us wisdom on days that we cannot think. Be her breath on days she cannot breathe. Carry her in the midst of her dark days. Don't leave her alone Father, please hold her hand. We trust you Lord. Clean out my heart Lord. In Jesus' name I release this prayer. Thank you Lord. Bless you Lord. God is good.
